Ya miss, I need to go to the nurse!

This 'demand' has brought a smile to my face more than once this year. More than one teacher has said, "these children would go to the nurse for a hangnail if I let them!"

Even more ironic, is that the school does not employ a nurse, it employs 2 full time doctors. The students always say nurse though.

I should add that the nurse/doctor/person in a white lab coat will 95% of the time send the sweet innocent not-so-sick children home if they show up in their office.

Here are my favourites:
-My lips are red, can I see the nurse?

-My glasses are broken, can I see the nurse?
Me: what on earth is the doctor going to do with broken glasses???
-Maybe she has more!

-My cheek is bruised, may I go to the nurse?
Me: if you stop punching yourself in the face it will go away, I promise.

But today's conversation was by far the weirdest ... but I guess everything gets weird when there's 20 days of classes left...

Omar comes to class, very pale and sickly looking. [No confidentiality problems here, I see approx. 65 students named Omar every day...]. Omar asks to go to the bathroom, but does not have his book of passes. Miss says "nope."

Omar "I'm going to puke."
Miss: "Go, but please don't come back. You need to go to the nurse.
Omar: "I puked 1st period. I went to the nurse and she said since I didn't have a fever I had to go back to class."

There's something fishy here. Seriously. Either Omar's not really sick, or he didn't really see the doctor... so Miss goes down the hall to the Middle School office. The secretary says, "Omar's mom sent him to school today because he has almost reached his limit of thirty-two absences this school year. He did not go to the nurse this morning but was too embarrassed to tell you the truth. I've checked his records, he's only at 26. I will call the family driver right now for him to be picked up."

For the record, Omar had to disinfect his own desk, chair and textbook before leaving to meet his driver. It only seemed fair.

Another day, another shake of the head...the weekend begins in 18 hours!